Think you won't cry? You will cry. Grandfather to games like IWBTG, this game will kick your ass and make you scream. (Most likely just make you laugh at how ingeniously it defeats you)
I beat this game back in my ninth grade programming class (I had a lot of spare time in that course..)
Play, post results! How many lives did you beat it with?!
EDIT: controls are arrow keys, Z to jump, space for turbo (useful for skipping through death animation)