Awesome! Thanks for testing that.
I’m grabbing the card i linked along with some cables and adapters. Price seems alright and the guy is helpful and quick to respond. Also means i can just get a regular AIC for more sata instead of m.2 shenanigans. I actually need more bandwidth than the ASM1166 would do 
Once stuff arrives I’ll see about doing config. With luck, it’s just figuring out how ports are connected to the chip and faffing about with plxmon like it was suggested here. I’ll do a writeup if i can get the necessary information.
Slightly related: Ebays “no accepted offers in cart” rule along with “no combined shipping with volume rebates” can go jump off a cliff. It is just frustrating for no good reason and makes shipping and payment a hassle that has to be manually arranged.