Too long didn’t read : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LwTxdI8O08&t=1s
it’s a tuesday night and you’re alone in your depressing apartment on your disgusting recliner, you’ve consumed an entire pizza hut family dinner box. The grease is dripping down your face onto your oversized cleveland browns jersey, since that’s the only piece of clothing that isn’t too tight.
For that small moment while you’re eating the pain is numbed by Pizza Hut’s trademarked Ultimate HERSHEY’S® Chocolate Chip Cookie. No more flashbacks to your traumatic childhood memories. You’re full now.
But this time you tell yourself “I’m gonna lose weight, I’m going to have my own family, I want my legacy to live on.” you’ve ordered everything from Ab-loungers, Ab-Crunchers, Treadmills, Ski Machines, ellipticals, stair climbers, bench presses, pull up bars, hydroxycut, you name it. It all ended up in the trash or in storage. But this time it’s going to be different. This life changing revolution that your ordered is called the Desk Cycle and instead of it ending up in storage or the trash, it’ll fit in your closet.
I’ve got absolutely zero clue what I’m talking about and I’m surprised you’re still watching, well let’s get to the actual review. First of all, why the hell did I buy this thing? It started last year when I first started cycling. Now that’s addictive. It gives you a reason to be in nature, instead of wasting my life away in front of a computer screen with all of my virtual friends, accomplishing nothing.
I just started working out recently to bring up my endurance and the gym is fucking awkward. I’m over there with pants on staring at people, they’re staring at me. Avoid all of that garbage. Just order a bunch of equipment for your house so you don’t have staring competitions with strangers.
So as constructing the desk cycle goes, it only takes about 15 minutes and includes a wrench to use. It took me 40 minutes since I’m retarded, so if you’re not retarded and you read the instructions you’ll be up in no time. As resistance settings go, there is settings 1-8. I prefer using 4. I find that a good middle ground between too tough and too easy.
So once I got it set up, I familizered myself with the resistance settings and then tried to use a computer with it. Good luck, no matter what desk, what chair I used I couldn’t get comfortable. So that plans out of the window.
So I set it up to play Xbox and it’s very comfortable. I used a stationary chair so I wouldn’t roll back and threw two pillows on it, that way my beautiful bulimic body doesn’t get bone sores.
If you’re distracted enough, boy o boy is it easy to burn some calories. Especially if you cycle or used to cycle. I can play for about 2 hours straight and burn about 800 calories. Whether that information is true or not on the desk cycle, doesn’t matter because it makes me feel good. I feel like I accomplished something.
My tip to you is don’t stare down the digital reader, ignore it. Do something for several hours and let the time spill. If you’re staring at it, it’s probably going to be hell. Only look at it every hour or half hour.
But remember this, don’t buy this if you’re not willing to dedicate time into it. That’s when things end up in the closet, or end up getting borrowed by your co-worker only to be forgotten about. Make a change, do something noteworthy with it and have your investment mean something.
As this product goes, I’ll happily give it a five out of a five. If it’s not making me waste money and time driving to the gym and having to deal with people. I can actually keep myself entertained and that’s worth a hell of a lot to me. The treadmill or bike at the gym is absolutely miserable. It’s not the fact that I can’t exercise, it’s the fact that I’m fucking bored out of my mind.
So don’t be bored, have the ability to exercise at home and entertain yourself. But remember don’t buy it if you’re not going to dedicate yourself to it.
