Escape from Japan

When I spent some time in Japan there was a sense of slow sterilized decay. It was very unsettling.

I guess it's my shameful inner Weeaboo that has made me so interested in Japan; especially when it comes to hearing the bad about the country. (actually, I really want to hear a bad. Maybe that's that good ol' Murican in me hoping to kill this shameful weeaboo that hides in my mind)

I mean, I get the fact that the only bit of it's "culture" that I have been exposed to are romanticized juxtapositions (I think I used that word correctly) of it, so I like hearing about the reality of the culture rather than these small snippets I consume in overly-jiggly animations I watch (if you catch my drift)

I've been deployed to several place overseas. Had some fun in Japan at Camp Zama. A lot of the female service members have bad experiences with men. Some of the people in Japan seemed to be just plain rude and to be xenophobic or heavily anti-western/american. Europe is easily the better experience for me. I loved Germany and I hope that I have the chance to go back in the next year. The people in Germany were some of the best people I've ever had the pleasure of socializing and working with. I'd have to say it was the first time I felt like I was judged for being who I was as a person and not for my appearance. Not saying you won't deal with that issue though, its from my experience less prevalent in their culture. Worst place is Afghanistan and Iraq. All I'm going to say is don't go to the middle east and if you do Israel at the most.

I don't hate or really look down on weabo's, I just feel they get duped into a trick over here and end up never reaching their potential out here.

Sorry If I come off as if I think I am better than them.

Nah man - weeaboos are weird (I've had my fair share of run-in with them, thanks to the stuff I do on Youtube)....But, I don't care if you talk down on them or not: I'm legitimately asking because I LIKE knowing about the bad and the good of the reality of Japan, rather than the slice of it from fiction I see through Anime.

I have already lived and worked in the middle east, visited Israel 2x, I can say the only place I didn't mind staying in was Dubai but I would not like to live there again ever.

As far as Germany is concerned that country considers people like me as right winger and equates us with nazi minded people. I would live somewhere in east Europe if I had a foreign company paying me big bucks and not caring about where I stay (remote admin or something). But that's not the case so I won't be trying to stay anywhere but good old USA, and Japan when I miss my wife and kids too much.

I personally don't consider it really a far right or facist view to like having kids and dream of a stable situation with a classical style family.
The fact that men over here are mostly beta or omega types whom have a general disdain for the success and pace of other countries disturbs me. They expect the world from these girls but are not willing to sacrifice things that comfort them even if those things are irrational, immoral and even worse down right wrong.

1 and 6 babies born in 2014 was either a foreign baby or mixed baby here in Japan....

The only silver lining I see is that by the time my kids is an adults mixed children will be nothing strange anywhere in Japan. Hopefully their influence can both help Japan progress and conserve what makes this place unique.

anyways still got a few hours of work talk to ya'll later.

:)

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I guess that really drives your point about the attitudes to women there.

But here's the real question that still needs to be answered, how's the internet?

Internet speeds are notoriously fast here I'm sure you have read about it.

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I also hear Japan has crazy suicide rates. ~30 000 every year. @juneshiha do you know why?

Work, time pressure, debt etc.
Many reasons to off yourself here.

We have that in Europe too but still don't kill our selves so frequently. I think they lack compassion for each other. I remember watching a video of foreigner in japan who was teaching english at school. He said some of the pupils picked his subject only because they were told the gaijin will listen to their problems.

Imagine some kid is getting bullied at school.He/she goes to teacher for help and they just don't give a fuck about their trauma. It must be horrible for the kids.

Seems to be a love it or hate it situation from what I have heard from the expats and foreign teachers living there. The general consensus from what i have heard seems to be that it's hard to assimilate and be treated as a equal in their society no matter how long you have been a resident or how well you speak Japanese.

This may have been true in this particular teacher's case, but I would have to say that it doesn't measure up to my general experience in Japan.

People of different cultures respond to stress in different ways. In some cultures, people respond to stressful circumstances by turning to drugs or interpersonal violence. In Japan, suicide is a more common response, especially for men. Sadly, none of these are solutions. I do think that a more open approach to communication about stress would be beneficial, both here and elsewhere, although it would only get at part of the problem. Like many industrialized societies, Japan is facing an epidemic of atomization, where traditional kinship structures and personal relationships have broken down, and people slip through the cracks.

A nicely academic approach to trying to explain this phenomena here in Japan, Fatalism however has long been a big part of Japanese culture, these days however I just find Japan's Hodge-podge of old world cultural quirks and new school apathy down right irritating.

They pick and choose when they wan't to be cultural or dogmatic but often, when it's a matter of morality or ethics they can quickly disregard culture.

China was easier to deal with in this regard because you expect it by default and keep people at arms length always, here it can sneak up on you.

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Yes, I do agree that fatalism plays a role. There is a tendency for people going through rough times to see themselves as being permanently stuck, resigned to a particular situation, more so than in other places I've lived. But I also think that it seems particularly so now because of the historical moment that Japan is in, and has been for the last two decades. Japan has a lot of deep, systemic problems that won't be fixed overnight, but might (hopefully will) be someday. It's in a deep slump. Young, mobile people looking for excitement, optimism, and promising career opportunities should probably look elsewhere.

I see culture more as a fuzzy collection of preferences or tendencies. If I think about the Japanese I know and the Americans I know, I would say that put under a lot of stress the Japanese would seem to be more likely to turn to suicide than the Americans I know, and I personally would attribute that tendency to upbringing, education, the messages they get from media, and so on--i.e., culture.

When you say

by "it", did you mean the fatalism, the apathy, or people going against their supposed ethics?

Can you clarify the "people like me" part?? I was raised in northwest Florida(which is basically Alabama). I have a mix of conservative and liberal views. What part of Germany were you in/visited. I know several Germans with a nuclear/classic family. Austria is kind of like that though. Especially Vienna, the people there HATE foreigners and believe they are better than most anyone. The most nationalistic people I've ever met. That's my experience at least with most conversations I had there.

Eastern Europe isn't too bad. Some parts are fairly rough though. I think best Eastern European country I visited was Poland and Ukraine(before recent events).

in india it is a lot worse, compared to japan india is really bad

well it's more than just suicide, a lot of 30 year old's are getting stress related heart attacks

can you clarify the "people like me" part?? I was raised in northwest Florida(which is basically Alabama). I have a mix of conservative and liberal views. What part of Germany were you in/visited. I know several Germans with a nuclear/classic family. Austria is kind of like that though. Especially Vienna, the people there HATE foreigners and believe they are better than most anyone. The most nationalistic people I've ever met. That's my experience at least with most conversations I had there.

I mean people with mostly conservative values, heck even my wife is almost purely conservative she works harder than I do and comes from a family whom runs a small but labor intensive business. It's definitely not easy here.

My personal experience with people from affluent western European countries does not paint a good picture to me about culture frankly, Germans are clever and most of the ones I have worked with are also excellently educated but if the topic is raised about the 'nuclear' family I usually find they have some wacky views and will trudge on about how people should not make more than 2 kids etc..... Saddening really.

A developer I work with whom is Polish often tells me of how much he would get in trouble during his days in Germany just for being rather forward with his views on pretty standard issues. I would not mind living in Poland if it was not for the fact that my work does not yet trust me enough to just remote into our companies network and submit work via company internal portal...

sigh I just wanna be back in the US for awhile. Been gone too long.

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