Shameless self-plug
Home security and automation thread
So if you want to do everything over Ethernet you can use these
Blue Iris seems to be worth it for cameras. It sucks because it isn’t FOSS and it requires windows but the feature set for the money is unbeatable.
Also, for wireless AP’s you can put them in the ceiling attic space and they will work through the drywall no problem if it is a new construction house if your wife doesn’t want to see any of them.