Aye but for other reasons. Tech is now completely made up of inbred monopolies. IoT, SDN, big data, quantum, and a few other technologies are going to allow the idiots to enslave. Now even car manufacturers are starting to track your every move and sell the data. :). Winter has passed it seems but the darkness is coming. I think we gave them something worse than nuclear.
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Dude, cheer up. You have allot to look forward to. I was medically retired at 39 too, I turn 50 this week. Raised a daughter, she is going to college this fall. I have had medical issues since I retired, and discovered more, but I keep chugging along. You did your bid for King and Country now take the time to find what you want to do and run with it. 2020/2021 has been really rough on me, I moved to Japan with work, life is not easy due to all the restrictions and work was an abysmal letdown, but I am still at it. You have many that care about you, even strangers. Take care bro!
Wexx
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I wish I could give up tech. But to progress in my career, I must push on. I understand the frustration of wanting to give up after things go sideways. Sometimes I end up breaking a lot of things before learning how not to. I write it off as a tuition expense (just too bad I can’t claim it on taxes 
). I hope Nvidia does right by you. As suggested above, taking a break could do well. Or maybe try a different aspect of the hobby if you’ve ever wanted to learn something else.
If there are issues with the marriage, don’t be afraid to seek some counseling. Money is such a relationship killer…it can bring drama and uneasy tension to every conversation. Getting on the same page on both sides is incredibly important.
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Never fully give up.
Take a break.
I find it healthy to bounce around between tech projects, and home projects, such as fermenting foodstuffs.
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One of the things me and my gf do to avoid situations like these is that we don’t have a “general” shared account.
We calculate fixed costs (mortgage, utilities, etc.) in advance and put that money on a shared account so we don’t run into annoying surprises. There’s some additional agreements about buying “consumables” (eg. food, but also printer toner, etc.)
For everything else we keep our own, separate accounts, so after everything’s paid for we do with whatever is left what we want as long as it doesn’t impact the other, in which case it of course needs to be talked through (like buying a pet that needs taking care off, or something huge that’d take over the living room, or the basement cough server rack cough 
)
Of course that’d only work if both partners agree to such an arrangement, so ymmv, but I’ve always wondered why more couples don’t do this, since money seems to be pretty high on the list of things to argue over…
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I haven’t gotten to the bottom of the thread yet so if you answered these already, my apologies.
I would have had a hard time understanding this/empathizing with this, but I was hitting HYT (keep in mind not active duty but reserve) and it made some kind of mid-life crisis bit flip in my brain. I went from “freedom and locked in retirement would be great” to “WTF, you are putting me out to pasture!? F U you are”. Maybe its just simple reverse psychology lol. So I think I get you on this now.
My fix (that I will likely regret) is finding a new challenge- and I don’t mean hobbies. An idle mind is the devil’s playground. I think for many of us if we don’t have something that holds our feet to the fire (a boss, work, deadlines, etc) our psych health goes bad, fast. So if we are having a similar experience maybe getting yourself committed to something is a solution- maybe seems counterintuitive. Retirement is a death sentence for some. Eric Conrad (great security cert instructor) said he will never retire after he saw what it did to coworkers he knew. People that I respected a lot while in active duty and/or reserves I noticed didn’t revel in retirement, they would move onto another challenge- a civilian contractor job, or be a busy official at a VFW or something. We need something that involves other people so social rules help direct motivation, obligation etc than to just ourself.
IMO retirement here is just a word to explain your DoD status, you can get engaged into something again that puts you into a group and people and held accountable by at least some of them. Its those things that IMO gets people to break through walls of ‘I failed, I just want to tap out now’.
Have you had a hormone blood test done? I just requested one and it got approved. Listened in on some podcasts of a relationship between TBI and hormones. I don’t have TBI but got exposed to some other nardly stuff while in the sand box and want visibility on the things that really affect our mood and health- the huge array of various hormone production.
Ninja edit: Wow @aLilBabyOtter and @Log 's relationship advice hits- need to apply it to myself!
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Hey guys, thank you so much for all the support. Things are going much better we are working things out in a much calmer way… So I’m happy with it. We’re figuring out things for me and she is working on herself too…so this is agreeable and best solution so far. We also have some strict limits and good talks we did as well. I’m happy with how things are.
Thank you so much to all below…and anyone I may have missed
@Trooper_ish @FaunCB @aLilBabyOtter @Log @Nefastor @Token @PhaseLockedLoop @bedHedd @Pip23 @Razor_Blade
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And @aBav.Normie-Pleb @Axe @w.meri @marelooke @ucav117 @redocbew @anon86748826 @Obakemono @Dynamic_Gravity @risk
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I’m happy that you’re seeing the light at the end of the tunnel after all that happened. It might not be too close or easy to get to, but I really wish you the best. I also understood even more why you felt the way you did about tech.
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Hey man, I just got married yesterday so I have been offline and didn’t see this until now. I am glad that you guys are working on things and moving forward. I wish you the best and hope things work out for the better.
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Congrats man, it really is a great thing.
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ive slowed down over the years and looked more at what i actually need vs what i was buying
i now have alot more money still a techy and im into gardening more and spend my time standing moving and doing vs sitting all the time
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Yeah I need some of that… Im working there. If i can start doing medicanal marijuana it would help the pain a lot lol… each time is like a mini vacation from the chronic pain… and stress…lol
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its helped me go from a shuffle to move to me walking my dog i smoke alot i dont even get high anymore really unless its super duper good but the more i move the longer i will be moving
i want to stay moving so i can at least make it to 60
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Smoke weed everyday
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Haha. Even trying to get senior’s attention or propose change that would benefit most customers in a single corp is hard. Trying to make a support clerk care Im sure even harder.
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Late to the party, but +1 on this. Fiance and I have a shared savings account with scheduled contributions that we have agreed upon and a shared credit card for things that we split 50/50 that we must pay in full each month (50/50 of course). Beyond that I have my account and credit card and she has hers. No cross-visibility whatsoever. As long as we each meet the very simple and clear obligations, neither of us scrutinizes the other’s spending at all (except maybe to poke fun a bit). We’ve lived together for about 6 years.
Oh and rent is also split, but we just send 2 separate checks.
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Yeah, I was making payments etc, the card I bought was the sticking point. We have it worked out well. It’s been very calm since we talked besides the storming out to the folks place initially. I never got us in a bind, were still fine and I was making payments on my own.
Again thank you to you all for the support and advice.
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Hey, glad things are improving, I always think of the fact that 40,000 kids die a day needlessly still, just through human unwillingness & apathy. Puts things in perspective a bit. Kind a softens the blow of any other problem. :). Someone, somewhere, needs your help, always.
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