Have you tried Nuclear Dawn and Natural Selection? In those games you can still play it as a RTS without bothering with first person shooter aspect. Maybe End of Nations -> free-to-play mmorts currently in beta though
Being quite an RTS fanboy i found R.u.s.e. to be amazing, and loads of fun, and although i havent played it yet Wargame:european escelation seems good as its from the same devs, the total war series is also loads of fun, and Dont worry about CoH #1 ... #2 is coing soon :D
^ Depends on how you play, thats why i loed it, i can still win a tank battle with just INf if you play right, but at first yea people spam, so i se your point!